adiva_calandia: (running down the road)
[personal profile] adiva_calandia
Jesus God but that argument summary took a lot out of me. And it's only a rough draft. And it sucks. But it's done.

This has been a bad weekend for academic productivity, all around. I need to get out of the dorm for a little while before I try to work on Critical Thinking or Dramaturgy.

It's cold out. I love it. I have to put away my sandals, pull out my shoes and boots, put on a jacket and a hat. It's like being home, for the first time in months.

Literally months. Geez. A couple times a week, it seems like, I get hit in the stomach by this quiet, sad homesickness. It usually has something to do with walking down Forbes Ave. and realizing how routine it is. Well, it should -- at this point I've lived in Pittsburgh, walked down that street, for more than two months. That's the total, counting pre-college. And then I think, "I shouldn't be so homesick; school's only been in session for about three weeks."

And then I remind myself that I really haven't been home in almost two months, and the homesickness makes more sense. I miss my cat. My parents call almost every day, so I can't miss them so much.

Here, it's fall -- I think. I don't have a great frame of reference. The last few days have probably been as cold as it is back home -- but back home, when it gets this cold, the leaves on the birch trees are turning brown and dying and falling, and termination dust is falling on the mountains. In fact, termination dust did fall on the Chugach range a few days ago, but Mum says it melted again. Here, I know the leaves are supposed to turn colors, but they're still green. So is it fall, or is summer just turning cold?

It's very disorienting. But I'll take my reminders of home where I can find them, and bundle up deliciously in a jacket and beret, and try to reorient.

And I'm sure that by '11, I'll be crying at the thought of leaving Pittsburgh, and I'll think about this fall and laugh.
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