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. . . for my own peace of mind, f-list, please reassure me that none of you dreamed about Cthulhu last night.

'Cause. Well.

The dream version of the Alaska Center for the Performing Arts had normal geometry, but it was . . . awfully big. ghost_light was, for some reason, doing a stage version of "Call of Cthulhu" for Summer Conservatory, but she was consulting a lawyer because she was apparently having some trouble with the Scientologists not wanting kids under 16 to portray their high priests. (Am I saying that Scientologists are actually priests of the Order of Dagon and just waiting for the stars to align? Don't be silly. It's not like they worship beings that came from beyond the stars or anything.) Lemme tell you, eight-year-olds getting their costumes for the first time are cute no matter what, even when their costumes are capes and masks to robe them as cult leaders.

And I'm pretty certain the Big Guy himself showed up, although he seemed to be there in more of a bureaucratic, organizational figurehead sort of role than in a devouring the world and bringing about chaos one. Didn't do much, let his spokeswoman do most of the talking, just kinda hung around in the shadow.s

I think Schwarzenegger might've been around somewhere, too. And there was some subplot involving an Emma Frost sort of woman getting married to a dim-but-not-that-dim but very violent Conan the Barbarian type that I swear could've come straight out of Girl Genius.

Okay, so all told, it wasn't a particularly portentous dream, but still.

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*sigh* I'm trying to read this stuff about food, famine, and poverty, historically and currently, because I have to write a three-page paper on it in a few days. One article makes this valid point:

Jean Ziegler, U.N. special rapporteur on the right to food, has called using food crops to create ethanol "a crime against humanity." "We've been putting our food into the gas tank -- this corn-to-ethanol subsidy which our government is doing really makes little sense," said Columbia University's Sachs. Former President Clinton, at a campaign stop for his wife in Pennsylvania over the weekend, said, "Corn is the single most inefficient way to produce ethanol because it uses a lot of energy and because it drives up the price of food."

I can't refute that, unfortunately, although the article goes on to quote the Renewable Fuels Association, who say that "numerous statistical analyses have demonstrated that the price of oil -- not corn prices or ethanol production -- has the greatest impact on consumer food prices because it is integral to virtually every phase of food production, from processing to packaging to transportation."

Let me just jump on a soapbox for a second and add my two cents:

You know where else corn and grain and soybeans go, rather than into the mouths of starving people? It goes into the mouths of cows -- beef cows -- and most likely pigs, too. It takes vastly more grain to feed up a cow for slaughter than it does to feed a human.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is why I remain a vegetarian. I know all the arguments PETA puts out about the inhumane treatment of animals in slaughterhouses; I know the health risks and benefits; I know the spiritual reasons from Hinduism and Buddhism. All those play a part in it. But what really just pisses me off is the waste inherent in making sure Americans get their beef.

Oof. Okay, enough ranting. I'm sure I'll have enough of that when I write the paper. Here, have some videos that make me happy:

Jeff Dunham and friends. This guy is AMAZING. HOMG. Watch Jeff and Achmed the Dead Terrorist, too, for your daily dose of "This is so offensive! I shouldn't be laughing this hard!"

And then make yourself feel better about the world with "I Love the Whole World," which is basically a shot of pure innocent joy straight into the aorta of your soul.